Damn, massed produced rubbish!

I went to town after work today to find a dress to wear to a family event on Tuesday. I've lost weight recently and I've begun feeling not totally crap about the way I look.
Everything I tried on made me look pregnant, or just like a sack of potatoes. The dress I really wanted had the effect of making my breasts look like they were trying to take over the earth.

*sigh*
I really hate off the rail stuff. It always looks so nice on the hangers, but when I try it on it looks rubbish! Well, no I don't hate the clothes, I hate my oddly proportioned body.
I would ask if anyone knew where I could find some cool and groovy sewing patterns, but I'm not entirely convinced anyone reads this anymore.